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Kids staying off social media is harder than you think. Quitting social media is not like quitting TV, or quitting video games, or quitting any other addictive behavior. That’s because social media is so tightly intertwined in our daily lives – often in ways you don’t even realize – that asking kids to quit social media entirely might be asking too much.
That’s not to put down our younger generation, or to suggest that they lack the willpower, courage, or fortitude of earlier generations. Instead, it’s simply a recognition that turning off social media entirely might put a serious obstacle in the way of achieving their dreams at an early age.
Social media everywhere
For example, think about kids and their extracurricular activities. Most likely, meetings (and especially impromptu meetings) are scheduled entirely via social media. You might still get updates via email or some other platform, but any last-minute changes to timing, date, or location are probably sent via social media. And, if you are planning to lead an organization, or to take an active part in any activity, you might be held back by an inability to reach out to your peers and connect with them where they are hanging out.
That’s why we constantly hear about kids who are not on social media being “outsiders,” or as people who just never quite seem to belong. If you’re not on TikTok, you won’t know about the latest viral TikTok dance craze. If you’re not on Instagram, you won’t know where your classmates went on vacation, or what they did over the weekend. If you’re not on X (formerly Twitter), you won’t know their reaction to breaking news, or to shared cultural experiences. Imagine binge-watching your favorite TV show, and not having any idea whatsoever what your friends are saying about it.
Time to re-think social media rules for kids
As kids everywhere are pointing out, there are some valid reasons to use social media. It can be used to de-stress and unwind. It can be used to keep up with breaking news. It can be used to communicate and collaborate with peers. And it can be used for entertainment. In other words, you might want to re-think any policy of banning your kids from using social media entirely.
But what are the realistic options? The best option is probably instituting some kind of social media curfew, in which you limit the time your teens have access to social media at key hours of the day or night. At the very least, you could place restrictions on whom they can follow on social media (probably just their close friends and acquaintances, and not random strangers who send out a friend request!).
Weekly cap on social media use?
And, finally, you could place a hard cap on how many total hours per week your kids use social media. According to a 2023 Gallup poll, one-half of teens are on social media at least five hours per day. We can probably agree that five hours per day is too much. So the usage limit might be significantly less, such as two hours per day. That would be just enough time to catch up on the latest developments, without getting locked into hours of mindless scrolling on a mobile device.
That being said, even a tiny amount of social media usage each day on a single social media account might be enough to cause emotional and mental problems. That’s something that parents need to keep in mind, and the chief reason why social media “cleanses” and “bans” are all the rage right now. But parents also need to recognize that asking kids to stay off social media entirely may no longer be practical, given how ingrained it is in their daily lives.
